Made for working together

Whenever you have trouble getting up in the morning, remind yourself that you've been made by nature for the purpose of working with others, whereas even unthinking animals share sleeping. And it's our own natural purpose that is more fitting and more satisfying.

-- Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 8.12

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

 

GROW Model - Coaching questions to consider

I recently came across the GROW model which I think complements my own RAGE model quite nicely when it comes to inspecting aspirations and goals. It's all about seeking clarity through questions:

Goal - What do you want? What's your desired outcomes (Aspirations)?

• What would you notice if you were performing in this area more proficiently?
• What would others notice if you were performing in this area more proficiently?
• What would be the benefits to your team / family / business / friends of you gaining proficiency in this area?
• What is the short- and long-term impact of you not enhancing in this area?

Reality - What's your current situation? Be brutally honest about current reality.

• What is the current state of your proficiency in this area?
• What have you done till date to develop proficiency in this area?
• What has helped your progress?
• What has held you back?
• How long have you been working on enhancing yourself in this area?
• Where do you feel stuck?
• What perceptions about yourself might be getting in your way?
• Are these perceptions accurate? How do you know?

Options - Exploring possibilities / Expectations. What could you do?

• What do you feel you need to gain proficiency in this area?
• What are the possible actions you can take to enhance yourself in this area?
• What else can you do? Probe deeper
• Now that you are aware of the possibilities, which one would you try first?
• What would you like to have happen?
• If you do nothing, what will be the impact?
• What does the wiser part of you tell you?
• If you were coaching someone on enhancing themselves in this area, what might you say to them?
• If there were no limitations/restrictions, what might you do?
• What options are within your control?

Will - What will you do? Commitment / Next Steps? 

• What support do you need to be successful in your next steps?
• What obstacles do you anticipate? How will you navigate them?
• How might you motivate yourself when things get tough?
• Who might be able to help you in achieving your next steps?
  

My wall art graffiti project from 2020, just before covid

So this post is a long time coming. Back in early 2020, just before lockdown hit us, my wife and I decided to take on a bold project by transforming our property's boundary wall into an art project. Our house was on the edge of a park, frequented by weekend warrior cyclists riding the Braamfontein spruit to Alberts Farm in Gauteng, which I used to ride as often as I could. 

So my wife and I thought it would be cool to show our appreciation for the spruit and cyclists by creating a mural using our property's boundary wall as the canvas. 

We contracted a cool graffiti artist, Nic, who goes by @dekor_one, check his work out!

Here's the journey that was, became and still is.... alas we moved to Cape Town the same year, and only got to spend 9 months appreciating the project...two years on and the artwork is still fresh!

My 2022 mid-year review of Life/Work streams

Tis the period of mid-year performance reviews in the workplace, so I decided to inspect my own personal performance with my time tracking metrics covering the dimensions that make up my life and work streams. 

I've been tracking these metrics for a number of years already and at least once a year, share the analytics and insights from this lifelong experiment. I created the term Personametry which basically is about telemetry (metrics) about the self (personal). Feeding Personametry is a framework I've created for myself for personal and professional development, my RAGE model.

At the start of 2022 I shared insights from my past six years of tracking and also followed up another post zooming in on the 2021 year, highlighting the main time sinks and the impact on other related streams. I set a goal of turning things around in 2022 to get to a state of balance I enjoyed prior to 2021.

With half the year over, 2022 is fairing much better than 2021 - as I've been very intentional about the changes. 

Here are the headlines (comparing 2022 with 2021 for the first 7 months, January to July):

• Work hours is down 28%
• Spirituality is up 53%
• Family time is up 27%
• Social time is up 75%
• Overall "Me Time" is up 16%

Holistically then, my process of re-calibrating in 2022 is having the desired effect. I'm spending time in the areas I've prioritized without significantly compromising on a major stream like my work (work obviously provides for the lifestyle I'm grateful for).

For more insights, check out the embedded slideshow :-)

In terms of my overall happiness sentiment and tracking my aspirations and goals as governed by my RAGE model, I'll share in a separate post in September '22. I've started to warm up more and more to Mo Gawdats' happiness formula which has helped me in coming to terms with the turbulence I've experienced with my job/career decision to disrupt and reinvent myself...stay tuned for the next write up!

Sharing Ramadan Itikaf Snippets

Ramadan is known as the Muslim month of fasting, one of the five pillars of Islam. The last ten days of Ramadan, especially the last odd nights in this period, are considered very blessed. As was the practice of the prophet Muhammad (May God's Peace and blessings be upon Muhammad and his family & descendents), he would spend the last 10 days in seclusion in the Masjid, immersed in various acts of devotionals. We commonly refer to this tradition as "sitting for Itikaf". This became part of his Sunnah, which the vast majority of Muslims include as part of their belief system (i.e. to follow both the Qur'an and Prophet Muhammad's Sunnah).

I sat my first Itikaf in 2018, at the age of 40. Since then, I vowed to sit every year until my death, no matter what the situation is at work, going as far as taking unpaid leave if needed (which I've done). Alas, during Covid-19 Masjids were either closed or not allowing Itikaf in 2020 and 2021, so I missed those two years. This year, 2022 was open so I maintained my commitment to continue my vow. Even though I'd recently switched jobs, starting a new career, with new bosses and new teams, with critical projects in motion and notwithstanding the fact I've not earned much credibility yet, I still wasn't going to let me pass up my Itikaf opportunity again!

Nothing was deemed more important, even if it portrayed me as being a weak leader or not-committed to the company, I put my faith firmly in God's hands and my resolution to remain steadfast to my value system priorities: My spiritual well-being Islam is first. There is no separation of identities. 

I wasn't always like this though, since growing up I'd focused on my profession (my job) putting it ahead of everything else.  Now, I view the world with a much broader lens. My job is absolutely still very important. In fact, as a Muslim, we treat our work very seriously, with great responsibility to account for halal income and maintain our work contracts in the strictest manner possible, strictly accounting for the time sincerely because we will be answerable for our time to God. So work is still a key component but not at the expense of my personal spirituality, mental well-being and family responsibilities. 

With enough up-front planning and expectation management, I was able to complete my Itikaf successfully this year.  

I find the workplaces have really started to embrace diversity and inclusion, which is quite awesome. My current company, is by far the best workplace I've experienced that promotes IDE, truly raising the bar. 

So what do I get up to in Itikaf then? 

When I sit for Itikaf, I try to cut myself out from the world as much as possible. I'm unreachable if there's a work emergency, sorry. I limit my interactions with immediate family. And a total black out of digital devices, social media, etc. digital detox. I also limit my interactions with fellow guests. 

A large part is private and personal of course. Maybe I'll share some of my journal insights in future posts? In this post, what I can share is that I don't spend all my time doing devotionals. I journal, meditate and also take time to explore my artistic side with freehand sketching things that catch my attention: Islamic art, calligraphy, poetry, etc. If you've ever ventured into a typical Masjid (Mosque, Muslim place of worship) you will have likely come across the most beautiful Arabic scripts of calligraphy, tile work, frames, etc.

So there is at least one day in my 10 days of seclusion where I spend a few hours sketching in my journal. This helps me process my thoughts, reflect on the beauty of Islam's art form, thus reflection in God's beauty and love inspired, is a form of remembrance in its own right. 

I'm not great at sketching though, so I'm sharing at risk. Hoping I can make more time for this as a regular hobby outside of just once a year: